Current mood:
adventurousCategory: Blogging
Patsy one of my closest friends,
just did a very thoughtful blog about one of my OTHER friends:
Michael the Rochester Guy
Her intent was to take the higher road and attempt to be what most of us more liberal
people do. (Take the high road).
She went on to describe how she seen Michael at face value vs her INNER peacemaking
personality.
What makes this so fascinating to me?
I am the EXACT same way in my thoughts as she was about Michael.
Yes, at one time, I as well had dropped Michael due to his abrasive nature of driving his point home.
I later re-added him because i had the same revelation Patsy did, that there IS good in Michael even if there is also some bad.
We ALL have some bad in us, but maybe we dont SHOW it as much as Michael does.
Thing about Michael is that his passion is too firmly attached to his demeanor.
So, being human, when he gets upset, he takes it out verbally.
I read both part 1 and part 2 of Patsys blog and ALL of the comments closely. No comment was put aside, I simply had to see what everybody elses take was on this.
Because I am interested in psychology, sociology, and human relationships, I have a lot of insight into the motives of what people generally use for their choice of actions.
I collected what i considered to be some key points from both Michael, and from the commenters and I will comment to each comment I collected:
Because this blog is SPECIFICALLY about Drama, please disregard my "No drama allowed in my blogs" rule in the upper right hand corner.
Michaels comment:
You encourage the pack wolf mentality that makes MySpace an occasional cesspool of sophomoric antics that mothers and wives think is all normal and fun because when their husbands are away, they can descend back to their "Heathers" high school selves and chase away people like that makes them feel important and worthy and somehow MATTER on this earth.
Me:
Michael, I agree that this mode of thinking happens entirely TOO much on myspace top blogs when "top bloggers" get attacked by anybody.
Its juvenile, immature and shows a weakness of those who "gang up" and furthermore actually insults the original target of the attacks' ability to defend THEMSELVES.
Michaels Comment:
You showed a lack of any integrity by just deleting a person without letting the person know what is up with him.
Me: Once again I agree with this statement. If you have the power to not worry about that persons feelings enough to delete them, also have a set of balls enough to say WHY to them.
How do you expect that person to know how to grow socially if you dont?
Eric Brooks contribution:
It seems notifying someone causes MORE hard feelings and drama than just removing them
Me:
Eric, thats a lame and cowardly way out of a "confrontation" that is actually NEEDED for social growth.
Princess Stacycakes contributed:
We win. Majority rules
Me:
Stacycakes, read what Michael said about Wolf Pack mentality, "majority rules" is EXACTLY that same mentality. Now if you use it in the context of: "somebody eventually will see their own faults if all others see it as well", then you are correct, but when you have just Michael "haters" majority does NOT rule because its biased.
Dances With Vodka contributes:
THEY DID NOT FORCE ME TO CHOOSE SIDES. NOBODY ASKED ME TO DELETE YOU OR MENTIONED YOUR NAME TO ME. I don't roll with a crowd or a pack or whatever.
Me:
Trish,
Michael had thought Grey had asked me to choose sides when I had dropped him but she was very nice to me about not expecting me to do anything but what I MYSELF wanted, so yes, this is ONE of Michaels weaknesses (the paranoia that somebody HAD to coerce that sort of decision)
Michael:
Patsy,
Trish is a former friend, and nothing is worst than a former friend, because a person who was always a non friend, or an enemy, has not crossed the line to betray
Me:
Michael,
Just getting dropped off a friends list is NOT betrayal.
Betrayal would be if they dropped you for no good reason if they had told you they care about you.
From Ubiquitas, MY PICK FOR "BEST COMMENT OF THE YEAR AWARD"
and to Patsy... sweet as always
Reminds me more and more of another "Cranky" profile.... to a T...
some like him, some don't,
some know him close and in private, others don't
some accept his level of brash towards others, others don't
some turn a blind eye, others don't
some see the silver lining within him, others don't
some have apologized for him, others have not
some have said "that's just the way he is", others also see that is the way he is
some validate him, others don't
some accept him, others don't
some follow him, others don't
some have talked to him on the phone, others have not
some have "grouped/packed" around him, others don't
some have him on there friends list, others NEVER will.
to each their own
Me: MOST poetic and pretty much the entire purpose of this blog, that was
so good i got goosebumps!!! :o)
From Kelly Jo:
He thinks insulting people makes him a winner?
Me:
Kelly,
Very good point. Michael DOES see the winner as the one who makes the best insult, that much is obvious.
(another improvement Michael can work on)
From Patsy:
his part of the blog in 5 minutes... the guy IS intelligent... but he is arrogant I admit... still he's got his good side and he has a role playing thin going here... we just need to be reminded of that...I have many times told him how I feel when he attacks people... something I can honestly say I never do... I don't use labels, I comment on the actions... I think Mike can't do that "diplomacy" thing that well.
Me:
Patsy, you hit the nail on the head, and thats a third thing Michael can work on his Diplomacy.
From Eric Brooks:
Gawd I had no idea the MySpace was such a SERIOUS place!
Me:
BEAUTIFUL, Eric, though that DOES support that all of these butthurt people should'nt take MICHAEL seriously by that reasoning.
Eironia Earbliss contributes:
bow chicka bow wow :)
Me:
I HATE THOSE WORDS!!! ARGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! lol
Richard Contributes:
As the blogs continued I started to get a little pissed off with some of his writing and comments towards women.
Me:
Always a rescuer for the women...look at MY friends list Richard, MOSTLY women, cause I care more for women then men so before anybody gets a STUPID idea that I support misogyny, I say pull your head out of your butt!!
But my concern for this statement is that you cannot see Michaels generalities for what they are: an attempt to GET people fired up to spark conversation.
then this:To Michael: I am sorry but I cannot in all concience remain friends on here with ANYONE who can be so hateful towards women
From Mystery:
She doesn't want to be your friend. She doesn't go around attacking YOUR comments; why not offer her the same respect? YOU lost her friendship. YOU must now live with that. But let HER live free from your hateful commentary in the meantime.
Me:
Mystery, this is a very great way to put it. Michael did that to me too when I had originally dropped him. Its immature (Michael, this is one of those things that needs the MOST work)
Also from Mystery:
But maybe you should actually think about why you are so angry at women. Maybe fix the reasons they repeatedly reject you?
Me:
Mystery,
I agree with quite a few of Michaels rants about golddiggers etc and in THOSE cases the women could ALSO use attitude adjustments.
If anything, I think Michael just needs to RELAX more and not worry about "image' when out on dates and therefore not CATER to golddiggers.
Michael:
I remained a friend of yours because we shared other things in common.
Me:
Thats why YOU are still MY friend Michael.
We all cant be 100% compatible.
Seattle Storm No 71:
Ummmkay Michael... I was going to stay silent until now... But this really hit a cord. You visit blogs, not because they have anything to do with your life. Because YOU want to, you want to support the writer. You want to stop by and say "Hi". You like the person behind the keyboard. Not the selfish need you have expressed here...
Me:
Seattle,
This is one of the BIGGEST issues that ALL people need to REMEMBER on myspace,
THAT IS A REAL PERSON ON THAT OTHER KEYBOARD!!!!
(yes I yelled cause it NEEDS to be)
Mystery:
Your friends are YOUR choice Patsy. While your becoming friends again with Michael may surprise me, it is your choice and I respect it. He was never ON my friend list at any point, so I cannot say I know him outside of his personal attacks on me and many others.
You know I adore you, and OUR friendship is between you and me and has nothing to do with who your other friends are. xo
Me:
Mystery, you are such a sweetheart! :o) THIS is what I think a mature adult does.
They do NOT make their friends make a CHOICE, thats selfish plain out and simple
(you CANNOT be his friend because I dont like him!)
Also from Mystery:
But c'mon. YOU KNOW you personally attack people: mostly women.
Me:
Mystery,
He doesnt DATE men, but if he did, I GUARANTEE it would be them he bitched about! lol
And another from Mystery:
It's sad when one's energy is poured into trying to generalize a certain age group of women into something most likely none of them are in actuality, when in my humble opinion, it could be better spent looking within, discovering some needed changes, and perhaps landing true companionship and happiness.
Me:
Mystery,
the first part is once again his way of seeing things thru stereotypical eyes from his own bad experiences, but your last part there has truth to it in certain areas. If you need change, recognize it, change it and reap the benefits.
michael:
It is great getting propositioned by email from ladies,
Me:
PROOF that Michael isnt misogynist
michael:
I make no bones I hate certain rock groups like Rage Against the Machine and Dave Matthews Band. I will tell people to their face that Tom Waits sucks, Dylan is overrated, and Alicia Keys is a stuck up beeotch. I like The Beatles, Rolling Stones, The Who, Led Zeppelin, I don't get Frank Zappa. I think 80s and 90s music is the best. I love only a few groups of the present
Me:
This is WHY you became my friend and still are. (yes and the likeable side of you too is a reason, when youre being GOOD! lol)
Michael:
I like liberals who also can see the other side of the argument. I like conservatives who don't see liberal everyday people as 'the enemy.
Me:
Michael, THIS is a perfect example for the blog readers here to read.
you like young women, others like older women, should you be unpopular just cause you dont have the same belief? hell NO!
Michael:
I like women who dress scantily. I prefer women who are blond and have big breasts and wear tight miniskirts with 4 or 5 inch heels.
Me:
You are giving me a hard on Michael!! I like that sort too but i better be careful or I will get haters too for being a normal male about sexuality!! ;o)
Michael:
I like to entertain and enrage. Amuse and anger. Piss off and preach. Smile and seeth
Me:
THIS is why you have haters, RIGHT THERE ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
you "like" to anger? MICHAEL!!!!!!!
Michael:
They may dislike my views, but to put all your energy into hating someone shows some really serious psychological issues that Melfi in The Sopranos could not even cure.
Me:
and I might add it wears you down physically, emotionally, and just generally ruins a day that could otherwise be happy on here. (myspace)
Michael:
I get a tremendous amount of hate emails and comments when I state that I like younger women. I mean, in the grand scheme of things, so fucking what?
I cannot believe though, as a personal decision, so called open minded people will support any kind of sexual or marriage arrangement except an older man and a younger woman. It is utter hypocrisy and pluperferect examples of political correctness run amok.
Me:
I'm gonna CRY Michael, thats such a GREAT point I even missed myself about all the liberal women who hate you for the younger woman bit!
Patsy - Do you regret any of your lines/comments on MySpace?
Mike - Of course, the wording of the infamous Paula blog was ill-timed, but I stand behind the reasoning of my initial remarks
Me:
Michael,
YES ill timed!!! stand behind the reasoning of the initial remarks?
Getting drunk and leaving with a guy is NOT permission for sex Michael.
Remember the purse being left on the table analogy I gave you to PROVE otherwise? how the THIEF is ULTIMATELY responsible?
Same goes with the rapist here.
HE committs the crime even if that lady walks out NAKED with him.
Michael:
I will call them out on any blog if I see them there
I will call you on it and allow you to sputter and make excuses until you finally apologize
I DO APOLOGIZE and have done it when I know I am wrong.
Me:
Michael, so WHO is the judge of who is wrong or right, THIS comes down to cultural and moral differences.
and to EXPECT an apology is really something you should'nt be DOING.
If you want an apology before re-adding, that may be a different story.
Ok, thats all folks,
In closing you all seen that I called Michael on his weaknesses just as I did to you on your own and I also pointed out the GOOD comments that are helpful.
Michael is very abrasive but he DID offer to make amends with many and even publicly apologized.
Now if you read the comment of the year award above, I in no way say you MUST or even expect you to be friends with Micheal cause its simply your own decision.
But at least I can say he is TRYING to improve by publically apologizing and actually noticing some of his own faults.
Have a Happy New Year everybody!
..
just did a very thoughtful blog about one of my OTHER friends:
Michael the Rochester Guy
Her intent was to take the higher road and attempt to be what most of us more liberal
people do. (Take the high road).
She went on to describe how she seen Michael at face value vs her INNER peacemaking
personality.
What makes this so fascinating to me?
I am the EXACT same way in my thoughts as she was about Michael.
Yes, at one time, I as well had dropped Michael due to his abrasive nature of driving his point home.
I later re-added him because i had the same revelation Patsy did, that there IS good in Michael even if there is also some bad.
We ALL have some bad in us, but maybe we dont SHOW it as much as Michael does.
Thing about Michael is that his passion is too firmly attached to his demeanor.
So, being human, when he gets upset, he takes it out verbally.
I read both part 1 and part 2 of Patsys blog and ALL of the comments closely. No comment was put aside, I simply had to see what everybody elses take was on this.
Because I am interested in psychology, sociology, and human relationships, I have a lot of insight into the motives of what people generally use for their choice of actions.
I collected what i considered to be some key points from both Michael, and from the commenters and I will comment to each comment I collected:
Because this blog is SPECIFICALLY about Drama, please disregard my "No drama allowed in my blogs" rule in the upper right hand corner.
Michaels comment:
You encourage the pack wolf mentality that makes MySpace an occasional cesspool of sophomoric antics that mothers and wives think is all normal and fun because when their husbands are away, they can descend back to their "Heathers" high school selves and chase away people like that makes them feel important and worthy and somehow MATTER on this earth.
Me:
Michael, I agree that this mode of thinking happens entirely TOO much on myspace top blogs when "top bloggers" get attacked by anybody.
Its juvenile, immature and shows a weakness of those who "gang up" and furthermore actually insults the original target of the attacks' ability to defend THEMSELVES.
Michaels Comment:
You showed a lack of any integrity by just deleting a person without letting the person know what is up with him.
Me: Once again I agree with this statement. If you have the power to not worry about that persons feelings enough to delete them, also have a set of balls enough to say WHY to them.
How do you expect that person to know how to grow socially if you dont?
Eric Brooks contribution:
It seems notifying someone causes MORE hard feelings and drama than just removing them
Me:
Eric, thats a lame and cowardly way out of a "confrontation" that is actually NEEDED for social growth.
Princess Stacycakes contributed:
We win. Majority rules
Me:
Stacycakes, read what Michael said about Wolf Pack mentality, "majority rules" is EXACTLY that same mentality. Now if you use it in the context of: "somebody eventually will see their own faults if all others see it as well", then you are correct, but when you have just Michael "haters" majority does NOT rule because its biased.
Dances With Vodka contributes:
THEY DID NOT FORCE ME TO CHOOSE SIDES. NOBODY ASKED ME TO DELETE YOU OR MENTIONED YOUR NAME TO ME. I don't roll with a crowd or a pack or whatever.
Me:
Trish,
Michael had thought Grey had asked me to choose sides when I had dropped him but she was very nice to me about not expecting me to do anything but what I MYSELF wanted, so yes, this is ONE of Michaels weaknesses (the paranoia that somebody HAD to coerce that sort of decision)
Michael:
Patsy,
Trish is a former friend, and nothing is worst than a former friend, because a person who was always a non friend, or an enemy, has not crossed the line to betray
Me:
Michael,
Just getting dropped off a friends list is NOT betrayal.
Betrayal would be if they dropped you for no good reason if they had told you they care about you.
From Ubiquitas, MY PICK FOR "BEST COMMENT OF THE YEAR AWARD"
and to Patsy... sweet as always
Reminds me more and more of another "Cranky" profile.... to a T...
some like him, some don't,
some know him close and in private, others don't
some accept his level of brash towards others, others don't
some turn a blind eye, others don't
some see the silver lining within him, others don't
some have apologized for him, others have not
some have said "that's just the way he is", others also see that is the way he is
some validate him, others don't
some accept him, others don't
some follow him, others don't
some have talked to him on the phone, others have not
some have "grouped/packed" around him, others don't
some have him on there friends list, others NEVER will.
to each their own
Me: MOST poetic and pretty much the entire purpose of this blog, that was
so good i got goosebumps!!! :o)
From Kelly Jo:
He thinks insulting people makes him a winner?
Me:
Kelly,
Very good point. Michael DOES see the winner as the one who makes the best insult, that much is obvious.
(another improvement Michael can work on)
From Patsy:
his part of the blog in 5 minutes... the guy IS intelligent... but he is arrogant I admit... still he's got his good side and he has a role playing thin going here... we just need to be reminded of that...I have many times told him how I feel when he attacks people... something I can honestly say I never do... I don't use labels, I comment on the actions... I think Mike can't do that "diplomacy" thing that well.
Me:
Patsy, you hit the nail on the head, and thats a third thing Michael can work on his Diplomacy.
From Eric Brooks:
Gawd I had no idea the MySpace was such a SERIOUS place!
Me:
BEAUTIFUL, Eric, though that DOES support that all of these butthurt people should'nt take MICHAEL seriously by that reasoning.
Eironia Earbliss contributes:
bow chicka bow wow :)
Me:
I HATE THOSE WORDS!!! ARGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! lol
Richard Contributes:
As the blogs continued I started to get a little pissed off with some of his writing and comments towards women.
Me:
Always a rescuer for the women...look at MY friends list Richard, MOSTLY women, cause I care more for women then men so before anybody gets a STUPID idea that I support misogyny, I say pull your head out of your butt!!
But my concern for this statement is that you cannot see Michaels generalities for what they are: an attempt to GET people fired up to spark conversation.
then this:To Michael: I am sorry but I cannot in all concience remain friends on here with ANYONE who can be so hateful towards women
From Mystery:
She doesn't want to be your friend. She doesn't go around attacking YOUR comments; why not offer her the same respect? YOU lost her friendship. YOU must now live with that. But let HER live free from your hateful commentary in the meantime.
Me:
Mystery, this is a very great way to put it. Michael did that to me too when I had originally dropped him. Its immature (Michael, this is one of those things that needs the MOST work)
Also from Mystery:
But maybe you should actually think about why you are so angry at women. Maybe fix the reasons they repeatedly reject you?
Me:
Mystery,
I agree with quite a few of Michaels rants about golddiggers etc and in THOSE cases the women could ALSO use attitude adjustments.
If anything, I think Michael just needs to RELAX more and not worry about "image' when out on dates and therefore not CATER to golddiggers.
Michael:
I remained a friend of yours because we shared other things in common.
Me:
Thats why YOU are still MY friend Michael.
We all cant be 100% compatible.
Seattle Storm No 71:
Ummmkay Michael... I was going to stay silent until now... But this really hit a cord. You visit blogs, not because they have anything to do with your life. Because YOU want to, you want to support the writer. You want to stop by and say "Hi". You like the person behind the keyboard. Not the selfish need you have expressed here...
Me:
Seattle,
This is one of the BIGGEST issues that ALL people need to REMEMBER on myspace,
THAT IS A REAL PERSON ON THAT OTHER KEYBOARD!!!!
(yes I yelled cause it NEEDS to be)
Mystery:
Your friends are YOUR choice Patsy. While your becoming friends again with Michael may surprise me, it is your choice and I respect it. He was never ON my friend list at any point, so I cannot say I know him outside of his personal attacks on me and many others.
You know I adore you, and OUR friendship is between you and me and has nothing to do with who your other friends are. xo
Me:
Mystery, you are such a sweetheart! :o) THIS is what I think a mature adult does.
They do NOT make their friends make a CHOICE, thats selfish plain out and simple
(you CANNOT be his friend because I dont like him!)
Also from Mystery:
But c'mon. YOU KNOW you personally attack people: mostly women.
Me:
Mystery,
He doesnt DATE men, but if he did, I GUARANTEE it would be them he bitched about! lol
And another from Mystery:
It's sad when one's energy is poured into trying to generalize a certain age group of women into something most likely none of them are in actuality, when in my humble opinion, it could be better spent looking within, discovering some needed changes, and perhaps landing true companionship and happiness.
Me:
Mystery,
the first part is once again his way of seeing things thru stereotypical eyes from his own bad experiences, but your last part there has truth to it in certain areas. If you need change, recognize it, change it and reap the benefits.
michael:
It is great getting propositioned by email from ladies,
Me:
PROOF that Michael isnt misogynist
michael:
I make no bones I hate certain rock groups like Rage Against the Machine and Dave Matthews Band. I will tell people to their face that Tom Waits sucks, Dylan is overrated, and Alicia Keys is a stuck up beeotch. I like The Beatles, Rolling Stones, The Who, Led Zeppelin, I don't get Frank Zappa. I think 80s and 90s music is the best. I love only a few groups of the present
Me:
This is WHY you became my friend and still are. (yes and the likeable side of you too is a reason, when youre being GOOD! lol)
Michael:
I like liberals who also can see the other side of the argument. I like conservatives who don't see liberal everyday people as 'the enemy.
Me:
Michael, THIS is a perfect example for the blog readers here to read.
you like young women, others like older women, should you be unpopular just cause you dont have the same belief? hell NO!
Michael:
I like women who dress scantily. I prefer women who are blond and have big breasts and wear tight miniskirts with 4 or 5 inch heels.
Me:
You are giving me a hard on Michael!! I like that sort too but i better be careful or I will get haters too for being a normal male about sexuality!! ;o)
Michael:
I like to entertain and enrage. Amuse and anger. Piss off and preach. Smile and seeth
Me:
THIS is why you have haters, RIGHT THERE ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
you "like" to anger? MICHAEL!!!!!!!
Michael:
They may dislike my views, but to put all your energy into hating someone shows some really serious psychological issues that Melfi in The Sopranos could not even cure.
Me:
and I might add it wears you down physically, emotionally, and just generally ruins a day that could otherwise be happy on here. (myspace)
Michael:
I get a tremendous amount of hate emails and comments when I state that I like younger women. I mean, in the grand scheme of things, so fucking what?
I cannot believe though, as a personal decision, so called open minded people will support any kind of sexual or marriage arrangement except an older man and a younger woman. It is utter hypocrisy and pluperferect examples of political correctness run amok.
Me:
I'm gonna CRY Michael, thats such a GREAT point I even missed myself about all the liberal women who hate you for the younger woman bit!
Patsy - Do you regret any of your lines/comments on MySpace?
Mike - Of course, the wording of the infamous Paula blog was ill-timed, but I stand behind the reasoning of my initial remarks
Me:
Michael,
YES ill timed!!! stand behind the reasoning of the initial remarks?
Getting drunk and leaving with a guy is NOT permission for sex Michael.
Remember the purse being left on the table analogy I gave you to PROVE otherwise? how the THIEF is ULTIMATELY responsible?
Same goes with the rapist here.
HE committs the crime even if that lady walks out NAKED with him.
Michael:
I will call them out on any blog if I see them there
I will call you on it and allow you to sputter and make excuses until you finally apologize
I DO APOLOGIZE and have done it when I know I am wrong.
Me:
Michael, so WHO is the judge of who is wrong or right, THIS comes down to cultural and moral differences.
and to EXPECT an apology is really something you should'nt be DOING.
If you want an apology before re-adding, that may be a different story.
Ok, thats all folks,
In closing you all seen that I called Michael on his weaknesses just as I did to you on your own and I also pointed out the GOOD comments that are helpful.
Michael is very abrasive but he DID offer to make amends with many and even publicly apologized.
Now if you read the comment of the year award above, I in no way say you MUST or even expect you to be friends with Micheal cause its simply your own decision.
But at least I can say he is TRYING to improve by publically apologizing and actually noticing some of his own faults.
Have a Happy New Year everybody!
..
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